What is and what should never be

You know, Nick, if I didn't know better I would think you were suggesting that listening to music on an iPod -- or even downloading in general -- is somehow gay.

But you do know better.

Of course, Zep's previous experience with the Internet was the Viking Kittens' fine rendition of Immigrant Song.

http://www.dennyweb.com/viking_kittens.htm

I always thought Zep was best suited to 8-Track tapes.

Recent studies reveal that 67 percent of all creative work done on the Web involves images of kittens.

The problem with 8-Tracks is that because a lot of Zeppelin's songs are so long you constantly get that annoying pause in the middle of a song when the track switches. Still, though, if you could wire an 8-Track deck up to, say, seven 100-watt Marshall stacks, that would be a righteous Zep rig.

“What you got back home, little sister, to play your fuzzy warbles on? I bet you got, say, pitiful, portable picnic players."

Tush, tush. For a start, outside the realms of music afficionados who position their £10000 speakers for the perfect listening experience, and with the damage done to the rest by many years spent too close to the stack at the Hammersmith Odeon, MP3 format will no doubt prove perfectly adequate. There's no indication of what the format will be, in any case - one would hope there'll be a lossless format for those who can tell the difference.

P.S. For kittens, look no further - http://www.runwiththekittens.ca/

Nick, here's a tip: Get decent headphones and turn up the volume. As someone who ripped the entire Zep catalog approximately 15 minutes after I got my first iPod in 2001 I can promise you Communication Breakdown will come through loud and clear (The Song Remains The Same live album still sucks though . . .).

Nick, didn't you hear that they are doing the theme song for the next sequel to Disney's franchise The Little Mermaid? They already recorded the music during this year's "reunion" but, of course, it will have to go through maximum audio compression for AM/FM radio play.

Just kidding, sort of.

I heard that the MP3 was to pay for the insurance of the concert. . . Imagine a stroke just before: hardly a probability, but having so many Led Zep fans running amok in central London, that's too much for reasonable investors.

Tush, tush.

No, that's ZZ Top.

You almost sound the way I felt when Metallica put out their first video.

No... you sound exactly how I felt when Metallica put out their first video.

Which is weird because while I was growing up - I could not escape Zep on the radio.

Zep going MP3 - progress. Metallica wearing eye shadow? The end of the fucking universe man.

No comparison.

Trust me on this.

That new Nissan SUV ad featuring the Clash doing Pressure Drop is the nail in the coffin. I mean, they even show "The Clash" on the guy's radio display just to rub your face in it.

What I couldn't escape on the radio, or elsewhere, while growing up was Stairway to Heaven, which I would agree is an abomination. The first album, though: that's a different story.

Metallica? Kind of destined for eye shadow, weren't they?

"Metallica? Kind of destined for eye shadow, weren't they?"

Actually, no. Until the Black Album, Metallica had released four albums, all Gold or Platnum, largely on word of mouth.

They wore t-shirts and jeans. And looked like their fans - and put on no rock star fronts.

They even let fans tape their shows.

Then, "And Justice for All..." came out and they released the video for One. It was kinda forgivable since the video itself was revolutionary at that point. Almost a real work of art. But it was a video nevertheless.

Then they hired Bob Rock to be their producer for the Black Album.

I was beaten up for liking Metallica at one time. A "long haired satan worshipping faggot". After the Black Album, those same closed minded fucks became fans and Metallica was suddenly all over the radio.

Really, it was crushing.

And it marked the end of Heavy Metal as the last form of rock n' roll that was worth a damn as a social statement.

What about emo?

How about this: Here on the left coast one advertiser was using The Who's "Bargain" on a car commercial! How about "Won't Get Fooled Again" at a political rally?

"What about emo?"

Some of it is great. But it's just not quite the same is it?

Then again - maybe I shouldn't have said what I said - I am no longer a teenager. I am getting old.

Metal scared people. It was terrifically misunderstood. Grunge and Emo?

I was kidding about emo. I think. Also, I confess to never having given much thought to Metallica. I was more into The Replacements at the time.

How about "Won't Get Fooled Again" at a political rally?

I'm sure it's been done.

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Nicholas Carr

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